Men who play mind games in a relationship can be frustrating. Plus, men can love and treasure you one moment and act completely uninterested the next, which could be even more annoying.
some examples of mind games that men play are:
Reading: Why is he playing games
- A guy may be interested in you and is constantly texting you. however, they may suddenly disappear when you reciprocate.
- You are with your man in a group and he starts flirting with other women to make you jealous.
- You guy can often criticize the way you dress, while others praise you for the same thing.
If you have encountered any of these, know that your man could be playing mind games with you. Read on as we discuss the signs of a man playing games with you and learn why men play such mind games and ways to deal with them.
12 signs a man is playing mind games with you
Men are often very clear about their feelings for someone. But if your man likes to keep you hanging without giving any clear indication of how he feels about you, here are some signs that he is playing mind games.
- hot and cold behavior: They used to text each other constantly for days and weeks before he suddenly cut off contact with no warning or reason. you worry and wonder what happened to him. but after a few days or weeks, he reappears with a reason that sounds absurd to you. this is known as “hot and cold” behavior. you know he’s been online, he just hasn’t sent you a message. if he does it often, then know for sure that he is just playing with you.
- not as good as his words: You go on a date with this guy and you both seem to be having a good time together. Shortly after the date, he texts you and asks to see him soon. you accept and then you wait for him to ask you out, but the message from him never comes. Tired of waiting, you text her asking for the date. now he gloats over the fact that you were expecting him and are interested in him. he basically showed interest and kept you hanging just so you could chase him.
- comments on your appearance: A few meetings with this guy, and you’ll hear him say something like, ‘you should exercise more often to look more attractive’ or ‘you should try a hairstyle that will make your face look slimmer.” When a man feels that you are too good for him, he will first try to kill your self-esteem by acting indifferent to your attractiveness. With such comments, he wants you to believe that you are not as attractive as you think and that he is the one who settles for a commitment in this relationship. this is a cunning trick indicating that he intends to play mind games.
- I ghost you multiple times: This guy calls you, makes elaborate plans for the day, and tells you he’ll be there, but never shows up. try to communicate with him, but he is not available. a few days later, he will appear apologizing and promising to reconcile. he may or may not make it up to you, but he will surely leave you in the lurch again. You feel like he’s dangling a carrot just for you to run after him.
- plays with your emotions: When you’re together, he may often ask you how you feel about him. you open your heart to him, sharing your love and affection for him. you can expect him to share his feelings for you, but instead he will change the subject. if he is someone too cocky, he might even annoy you by explaining his fantasy of dating another girl despite knowing how you feel about him. these men enjoy teasing women and shaking their emotions, and often do so without any guilt.
- Maintains contact just for sex: You realize this guy you’re dating is absent most days, but he suddenly showers you with attention when he needs sex. he won’t bother to reply to his message for days, but suddenly he seems active and interested in you. he might even falsely assure you of his feelings for you, but his actions never back up his words. if this is your case, then he is using you. run away from him as far as possible.
- He doesn’t introduce you to his family: If a guy introduces you to his family, it means he might be serious. if he doesn’t, then he probably isn’t. He may invite you to hang out with his boy gang, but he’ll never take you to meet his parents or siblings or anyone important to him. He might be doing it because he’s not entirely sure of his feelings. for you. he gives you little glimpses into his life just to keep you hooked until he finds someone better.
- makes you follow unreasonable rules: sets rules for both of you that can make you feel like you’re their dirty secret. for example, the two of you may not hold hands in public, or you may not post pictures of the two of you together on social media. he can do this because he could be dating several women simultaneously and he doesn’t want to get into any trouble.
- treats you badly in front of others: your guy suddenly transforms into a demeaning monster who makes sarcastic comments about you. Men often like to show dominance in a relationship, but putting your partner down is the worst thing to do. They can even pretend to command you to impress others. If your guy does this, you’d better talk to him before it gets out of control.
- He never texts you first: No matter how well you guys get along in person, this guy never texts you first. when you’re together, he gives you the impression that he likes you and enjoys your company, but he never takes the initiative to text or make plans. if a guy is doing this to you, forget about it and move on as he is most likely just being nice to you and has no romantic interests.
- Flirts with other girls in your presence: He may be a great guy, but he just can’t seem to kick his flirting habit. what makes things worse is that he flirts in your presence. he may say he’s a harmless flirt, but his behavior makes you uncomfortable, which is probably what he wants. if he doesn’t consider your feelings and continues, he may be to make you jealous and show off his ability to impress other women. It’s his way of playing mind games showing that he doesn’t really need you.
- talks about his ex too often: It’s okay to bring up your past relationship with your current partner, but if your guy seems to talk about his ex too often, it’s a clear indication that has not overcome them. She is probably filling the space that his ex left with you and will continue pining for him regardless of your feelings. remember that those men will not think twice before leaving you and going back to his ex or someone else.
10 reasons why men play mind games
There may be more than one reason men play mind games. these are some of the most common reasons behind such behavior in most men.
- satisfy your ego: Men can be extremely self-centered at times. by making you care about them or chase them, they enjoy the feeling of being desired by a woman. makes them feel safer.
- enjoy exercising power: when you chase them, asking why they don’t answer or why they don’t call back, they understand the kind of influence they have over you. they may not have control over other aspects of their life, so they enjoy exercising control over their emotions.
- You are perceived as a challenge: Many men jump into the chase because they enjoy the process. To them, impressing a woman is like a challenge they’d do anything to win. once the girl is impressed, they have met her challenge and show no interest in the woman.
- suffer from low self-esteem: Some men suffer from low self-esteem and need constant validation of their appearance and attractiveness. his restless reaction to her hot and cold behavior gives him the validation he is seeking for himself and therefore he enjoys doing it all often.
- interested in sex: Some men are only interested in physical intimacy. they will play endless mind games to get it because they feel they deserve it or have earned it. sex is like a trophy that they think they deserve after ‘winning’ you, since they’ve done all the hard work.
- try to dominate: Some men just like to be dominant in a relationship. by playing mind games with you, they feel like they can keep you in check while they get their way.
- they want something from you: they may want something you have, such as money or some other good that is difficult to obtain. he may not like to ask you outright, so he’ll twist your arm with his silly games, to get you to offer him what he wants on your own.
- just for fun: yes, it is painful to know that some men can rock your life just for cheap thrills. in fact, they enter your life only to disturb your peace and quiet. just seeing you fidget can give them the satisfaction they want.
- fear of vulnerability: Men who have been hurt in the past may be overly cautious about dating. They like you and show interest in you. when you reciprocate their feelings, they suddenly feel scared and back off to protect themselves from getting too involved to the point of hurting you.
- test your loyalty: Maybe your man is playing those tricks just to test your interest and loyalty. he wants to know if you’re serious with him and won’t mind trying a trick or two he has in order to understand you better. Also, some guys just have a nature as such, it can be due to various factors such as their family, school, etc. so, before you.
ways to deal with a guy playing with you
Discovering the fact that someone is messing with you can be immensely painful, especially if you thought he was “the one” for you.
- don’t panic: what do you do when a guy, who has been fighting for your attention for weeks, suddenly turns cold? he’ll probably panic and wonder what went wrong. don’t do it he is backing off either to sort out his own feelings about you or to test your reaction. then what you can do is give it time. don’t go chasing him. instead, wait for him to come back to you without worrying too much.
- don’t listen: when we say ‘it’s not you, it’s him’, we mean it and not as a consolation but as a fact. some men can be mean, and it has nothing to do with how you look or how you behave, so don’t blame yourself for anything. instead, cut them out and turn the spotlight on the people who matter.
- confront him: If you’ve known your guy for a while and he still won’t stop playing these stupid mind games, then stop him. tell him that you despise those games and that you are not ready for them. let him be ashamed of his cheap tricks, lest he deliberately try to repeat the same behavior.
- Define your relationship: Without any strings attached, it’s easy for men to come and go with you. If you have been dating this man for a while, be honest and ask him to give your relationship a name. if he was never serious with you, he will disappear from the scene, and if he was, then he will stop playing games and be more genuine with you.
- respect yourself: after being showered with affection when your guy walks away, you may feel confused and do everything you can to win it back. In this deal, you might come across as needy, which could drive him even further away from you. instead, he takes your position and refuses to let you play games with you. be confident and settle only for a true gentleman and not a conceited guy. just walk away like you deserve better.